The Blahhhhrbs

When I posted my works on Authonomy–which I recommend as a resource for writers who want a non-biased look at their work (provided they’re not the ‘this is gr8, plz read my book!’ critiques)–they had me write up a short pitch and a long pitch to describe my works. The short pitch was hard–sum up your book in twenty-five words or less. The long pitch gave you more, I think about two hundred, and read like the blurb you find on the back of a book.

Well, I realised today that while I’ve posted excerpts from my five on-the-go novels and talked about them a bit over the past month, I never did just give a back-of-the-book style blurb for readers to see if they thought they’d be interested in my works.

So, without further ado, the Blurbs for my five novels, plus my NaNo project, which will also be turned into a novel after November…


Centuries ago, the technologically advanced clone race—the Sociotopians—made contact with the pre-industrial nations of the southern continent. Relations alternate, and the now industrialised continentals distrust the arrogant Sociotopians for the most part, though some of the clones have decided to exile themselves and intermix with the continentals.

Elliet Regan is the result of one such union. A palaeontologist, a cross-dresser, and an assassin working for his family’s organisation, he has more to worry about than the affairs of his father’s homeland. Benevolent mercenary Jared Simnel, seeks constantly to destroy him, while the jaded inspector Iobel Vindemar never stops looking for a way to make Elliet pay for his crimes.

But their grudges are put on hold when soldiers of unknown origin abduct every single Sociotopian and Sociotopian descended person in the mid-western part of the continent, Elliet’s siblings and two of Jared’s friends included. Elliet alone escapes, and with his friend Lizelba must ally with Jared and Vindemar to confront this mysterious threat and rescue their loved ones.

If Jared will let Elliet get that far, that is…

This one was difficult, because there’s so much backstory for Dolorelamia and the premise is hard to explain quickly. It may get overhauled along with Dolorelamia itself when the time comes…


The Land of Camelot, resurrected on the tomb of London, is protected by a force-field called the Endless Knot and by the Rooks—soldiers; feared, admired, and often hated by the citizenry.

For centuries following a catastrophic war the Rooks have safeguarded Camelot, but their brutality has pushed some citizens too far. Seemingly without warning, a team of rebels infiltrates and takes over a section of Parliament, the stronghold of the Rooks, determined to be the first people to leave Camelot in over seven hundred years.

Tryamour and Unghared become their hostages—two very different girls both trying to keep themselves and their companions alive. Yvain by contrast fights with the rebels, but begins to question the worth of their actions. Dorigen and Degaré, a physics student and a Rook cadet, face the same questions but from the opposite side, while Palamon is determined to somehow find his true love within this chaos.

But with the rebels aided by fanatic outsiders and the Knights who control Camelot with their own agendas, it begs the question of whether Camelot should be freed from its oppression…

…or whether it’s better off with the devils it knows.

This one went through several changes, as it was also tricky to explain quickly. Then again, I am naturally long winded… The next ones haven’t been worked on quite as much, they were merely there to consolidate my ideas.


1953. Five tragic deaths open up five places in the esteemed academies of Wells’ and St. Margaret’s, two schools that border each other in remotest Northumberland. As the rains weep over the funerals of the dead, one of these places is filled by John Evelyn Mandeville, a strange red-eyed boy of dubious origins.

Regina Langstrom finds herself drawn to this fellow oddity, alienated from her classmates for her ethnicity and more so for her own secrets. She’s half African-American, and had lived there with her mother since being evacuated aged three, only to be sent back to her father and grandmother following a terrible event.

While her classmates are mostly cordial, her only close friend is a person she’s never met—a pen pal of sorts, who leaves her letters in the local cemetery. Stranger things than that are afoot though, the sudden rash of burglaries, the eerily familiar new school matron and the presence of two shadowy figures in suits speak to that.

Then one evening as she arrives to collect her latest missive, Regina sees John Evelyn in the graveyard, apparently digging something up…

Lol, just noticed I’d written ‘Northumbria’ rather than Northumberland before I posted this. Must have forgotten it was 2013, not 1013!


Having been torn away from her life and family, her powers of divination lost and her future uncertain, former priestess Orinetpho was fortunate to save her twin brother Orinetph from certain death. Now they and a northern girl called Sukemi have been bought to serve Duke Daiki of Quanten Island, a childhood friend of the King of Aro.

Orinetpho’s new life as a handmaiden for Daiki’s nine-year-old son and heir, Daizeki, is one of mostly ease and comfort, her biggest worries are learning the language and customs of the Arosians, and trying to keep away from the lowest level of the palace, where the spirit of the sword of Daizeki’s ancestor, Mako, keeps an ancient evil contained.

Then the duke is called away to war, taking Orinetph with him. With the soldiers gone another branch of the descendants of Mako, the Tabikaki, seize the opportunity to reclaim what they believe to be their rights on Quanten Island. Orinetpho finds herself on the run with her young master, and no one to protect them from the Tabikaki…

…except, perhaps, something from the lowest level of the palace…

It was strange, when I saw this came next on my list of BOOK IDEAS I had actually forgotten that I’d thought of it before 518; I’ve done so much more work on the latter. I think Dread is a keeper though, so maybe it will be added to after November…


Life on Earth had become complicated for Ira McKentish. Well, it had become complicated for everybody, following the invasion of the Selena Empire—a nigh on unstoppable army of over thirty different species, determined to add Earth and all of humanity to their fold.

An army who, for all intents and purposes, have succeeded in their goal.

But sometimes life pulls you in strange directions, because the Selena have granted Ira the opportunity to join their ranks, as one of the Imperial Military Police. And it was all going so well until the destruction of a space station in Selena territory brought him and several of his fellow recruits out to one of the remotest parts of Selena space.

Their mission is ostensibly to investigate the incident as part of their final exam. But as Ira and his new friends dig deeper into the circumstances surrounding the tragedy, an unmistakable connection to events from Ira’s past begins to make itself known.

Was there significant human involvement in this act of terrorism?

And who could have given them the means, if there was?

I’m not really happy with this blurb, but I suppose I could work on it after November too. Or during November, if Shaedai starts giving me too much trouble and I want a break. Which is likely. (It’s more likely that break will involve me lying on the sofa watching pet rescue shows, of course)


For thousands of years the unstable relationship between Humans and the Shaedai; the spirits, fae, ayakashi–call them anything you like, has been goverened by an elite group of two dozen or so families chosen by the Shaedai themselves, bound in blood to the Place of Shadows, endowed with special powers one and all.

Even now in the 21st century, these houses must still adhere to the conditions of the pact that keeps the balance between Human and Shaedai, with all the rituals that go with it.

And the formost of those rituals has begun again.

At dusk on the night of the summer solstice, the ‘princess’ is chosen from their number, and nine boys from nine other houses with her; Xiang, from an ancient Chinese dynasty based in California, and Tarquin, from a British family living in India among them. Along with one companion, their quest is to obtain enough tokens to duel for her hand.

And it’s a duel to the death.

Meanwhile Elodie, whose African family moved to Canada long ago, has also been chosen; chosen as the Challenger. It is her destiny to challenge the Princess for her title, and her destiny to fail as every Challenger has done for millennia.

And then there’s the Princess herself…

So there you have it, the anthology of Rachelloon, summed up in six Blahhhhrbs. Well, not really the entire anthology, there have been quite a few that I’ve abandoned… let’s hope these don’t end up on that pile, but instead in each and every home in the nation!

…as a doorstop.


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